I will admit it: I love Facebook. I thought I would hate it and so I avoided joining for some time. Some time ago, I had tried My Space and thought it was horrible, so I was expecting something similar. But I love it! Why do I love it? Well, I am really far away from lots of people that I love. And the time difference makes telephone calls kind of complicated. So I love getting up every morning and checking to see what my friends were up to the day before. I love that I get to see when my brother puts a new cabinet in his kitchen, how my niece changes month for month, what my silly little nephew is up to, how my friends' kids are growing in leaps and bounds. And at the same time, I can share photos of the Bean, ask questions like "who is using cloth diapers?" and "do you give your baby a pacifier?" or just plan a trip to Ikea with my friend. For these reasons, I have come to love Facebook.
At the same time, I find Facebook difficult. Often, I wrestle with whether or not to comment on a post. When there are already 10 comments on a photo saying "cute!" should I make it 11? Is it meaningful to that person that I comment?
Or my most current struggle - when someone makes a statement that you just can't agree with or writes something that you personally find to be offensive, is it necessary to comment? Or could it just be damaging to the relationship, especially because that person can't hear the tone in your voice as you're commenting and might misinterpret your words? Or what if you do comment and then they respond to your comment in such a way that you feel offended and the relationship suffers? Is it worth it? But what if you don't comment, because of said doubts and then just have this feeling like you missed a chance to tell them something that's important to you. That not commenting leaves an elephant in the room that you just can't get past. That your relationship with that person is affected by your not commenting and they will never even know what happened.
What do you think?
About Me
- Sarah
- Stuttgart, Germany
- I'm an American, a Michigander, to be exact (or is it Michiganian??), living in Germany. I moved here on a three-year assignment with an automotive company, fell in love, got married and am now here to stay.
Us
The Bean
Stats
Noah Luke
2 comments:
I LOVE Facebook. It is kinda dangerous because I have it on my phone too, so it is always just a moment away! I love it for all of the same reasons you do!
I feel the same way when I come across posts I disagree with that people put up or even pictures of things that I don't care for. I usually just don't comment but that is also because I am non-confrontational even face to face.
Here is my question...Do you find yourself thinking in 'wall post language'??? LOL!
This post asks a lot of great questions that I wrestle with on the platforms I use to communicate with not just friends but also the general public (twitter).
For the "easy" question: when someone posts photos or a status that I expect quite a few people to comment on I generally write on their wall (kind of like I did with you and the recent pictures of Noah).
Now for the "hard" question: I completely try to stay away from polarizing or offensive content, both in posting it myself and commenting on it if others post it. It never ceases to amaze me what people will say on the internet, sometimes things that they would probably never say in person. I've followed a few conversations on facebook and I very rarely see a positive resolution come from someone commenting on an offensive post or posting an offensive status. You'll even see other friends getting drawn in antagonizing one side or the other at times. Another problem is the text on these public platforms contains no context, tone or social cues that indicate the severity (or lack thereof) of the statement made so it can be easy to blow things out of proportion and cause problems where none should have occurred.
My rule of thumb is if I wouldn't say it to anyone, or respond to just anyone making the comment I stay away from it.
If you really feel the need to say something because you've been offended and you think something could be gained from letting the person know then giving them a call or sending them a personal note or email is probably the best route.
Probably all things you've already thought about, but that's where I sit on the subject matter today. Thanks for the thought provoking post!
Post a Comment